I blame you, I hear you

Couples' pronoun use in conflict and dyadic coping

Datos Bibliográficos

ID2920568
AutoresTabea Meier (0000-0003-2902-4113, University of Zurich, autor de correspondencia), Anne Milek (0000-0001-6179-4869, University of Münster), Matthias R Mehl (0000-0003-2698-5007, University of Arizona), Fridtjof W Nussbeck (0000-0003-4002-8916, University of Konstanz), Mona Neysari (University of Zurich), G Bodenmann (0000-0003-0964-6409, University of Zurich), Mike Martins (0000-0003-0876-2598), Mike Martin (0000-0003-1584-0312, University of Zurich), Martina Zemp (0000-0003-0065-5966, University of Vienna), Andrea B Horn (0000-0003-2729-7062, University of Zurich, autor de correspondencia)
Año2021
Volumen38
Número11
Páginas3265-3287
Fecha de publicación2021-11-01
Peer ReviewedSí
Open AccessSí
TipoARTICLE
RevistaJournal of Social and Personal Relationships (JOURNAL)
Identificadores de la revistaISSN: 0265-4075 • E-ISSN: 1460-3608
EditorialSAGE Publications Inc (PUBLISHER)
DOI10.1177/02654075211029721
OpenAlexW3180460264
IdiomaEN
Citas recibidas11
Referencias citadas47

In dyadic interaction, a verbal focus on one individual ("you-talk," "I-talk"), rather than on the couple ("we-talk") has predominantly been linked to dysfunctional relationship processes. However, context differences in these links have not yet been systematically examined. Is it functional to asymmetrically focus on one partner during support interactions but problematic during conflict? Does a high level of couple-focus represent a resource across contexts? In this preregistered study, we investigated dyad-level pronoun use (we-/I-/you-talk) and their link to situational relationship functioning (SRF) across three interaction tasks (one conflict, two dyadic coping tasks) within couples ( N = 365). More specifically, we examined associations of couple-means, i.e. pronoun use as a shared resource/vulnerability between partners, and couple-differences, i.e. functional/dysfunctional asymmetric pronoun use with observed interaction positivity and relationship climate. Results revealed both context differences and similarities. Asymmetric partner-focus (i.e. you-talk) was dysfunctional in conflict, whereas asymmetric partner- and self-focus (i.e., you-talk/I-talk; focus on the stressed partner) were functional in dyadic coping. Beyond asymmetry, you-talk (couple-mean) showed consistent negative associations with SRF in all tasks studied. We-talk (couple-mean) was positively linked to SRF, but only in conflict interactions. In conflict, couple-focus thus represented a shared resource that can buffer from dysfunctional conflict interaction characterized by partner-focus. In line with conceptual frameworks, the dyadic coping results emphasize the importance of focusing on the partner in need. The study corroborates the prospect of pronoun use as a context-specific indicator of relationship functioning. Gender differences, implications for future research and possible interventions are discussed

Developmental psychology · Dyad · Dysfunctional family · Linguistics · Partner effects · Pronoun · Situational ethics · Attachment and Relationship Dynamics · Child and Adolescent Psychosocial and Emotional Development · Clinical Psychology · Language, Discourse, Communication Strategies · Psychology · Social Psychology